HWIL: this is real. HWIH: christmas on a budget.

Here's what I love: this is real. I mean, this whole relationship with Christ--walking with Him, listening to His words, learning more about Him moment by moment. It's real. I am sure that some people--some of my dearest friends even--would think it's crazy. Like having an imaginary friend or talking to the dead. But, I am convinced completely that this life I am living now is only the beautiful beginning of an eternity with Someone who created me simply to be with Him. Right now, this reality--a Kingdom if you will--lives unseen. Hebrews 11:1--"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." But one day, I will close my eyes and open them again to the shining gift of SEEING what I now know to be true. Wow. I can't wait! Sometimes my heart hurts when I try to think about what it will be like to be able to see Him looking at me, loving me. It's fun though to realize that so many of the good experiences we have in this world are just tastes of what's to come. Innocent love, laughter, times of peace and contentment, that feeling of joy when you look your friend in the eye and know that they love you--those moments when your heart is whole and you can't help but smile--that is the reality of God. James 1:17--"Every good and perfect gift comes from Above..." He is constantly blessing us with these gifts. Little moments like grains of sand in an hour glass. One moment at a time--with each breath sensing the reality, not only of His existence, but the reality of His unending love.

Here's what I hate: Christmas on a budget. You'd think that after the post above I wouldn't have anything to hate. But, I can't help but feeling tense when I start making my Christmas list. Why? Money. I'd like to think that I am so generous that my heart's desire is to be able to give good gifts to everyone who touches my life in some way...neighbors, teachers, family, babysitters...but, the ugly truth is much of it is obligation. When gifts are given out of feelings of obligation, then it is only money that will help--and when there's not enough of it, then we start to feel cranky. BUT, if I begin to ask the Lord for His eyes for each of the people that touch my life, then I think I will begin to get creative. I will make things if I have to. I will use the comodities of time and talent when money runs out. I will give out of love. And then, I will love to give.