Too Many Chores

The other day, I asked my newly-turned-twelve year-old daughter to do three easy chores for me.  (My 20-something year old friend, Conor, told me that my mistake was giving the number—even if the chores were easy—saying THREE might as well be three million.)

Anyway, here are the chores I listed: 

1.  dust-bust the stairs.  (suck up dust-bunnies with the hand-held cordless vacuum…fun and fast!)

2.  Swiffer-dust the surfaces in the guest room. 

3.  Windex the mirror in the guest bathroom. 

Here is what she must have heard:

1.  Sweep the stairs with your hair—make sure you take an hour. 

2.  Manually pick up each miniscule piece of dust with tweezers on every surface of the guest room.

3.  Lick the entire mirror in the guest bathroom clean with your tongue.  Twice. 

The reason I think she must have heard this list is because of her reaction.  If you have a child, you’ve seen the classic groan-eye-roll-neck-failure combo.  The one where the child simultaneously thrusts their head back, groans and rolls his eyes because of how difficult his life is. 

Then, I made a terrible parenting mistake.  I responded to her immaturity with immaturity of my own.

“Fine!”  I answered, snatching up the cordless vac, Swiffer duster, and Windex with a touch of force.

When she saw my dismay, she said, “No, mom, I’ll do it….” as she lamely lifted one hand and weakly stepped in my direction.

“No, no, I’ll do it myself!”  I quipped with a little bitterness.

I timed myself.  All THREE chores took me Four minutes and 53 seconds. 

I had asked her to take less than five minutes of her day to help me out and she refused.  But, it wasn’t the refusal that bothered me as much as the attitude. 

I could have made her do it.  Even without my immature outburst—I could have calmly insisted that she do those THREE chores.  But, what I was really looking for is a cheerful response. 

I didn’t need her to do them—as mentioned, the chores took very little time for me to do.  But, she missed an opportunity to serve in relationship with me.

It made me wonder—do I do this with God?

It’s true that God doesn’t make me dust or vacuum or Windex.  But I believe He does ask me to do things.

In fact, an exchange between us could look like this:

God: Good morning darling daughter, I was wondering if you could do several simple things for me today?

Me:  SEVERAL?!  How about one?  Or a few, I might be able to fit in a few.  What are they anyway?

God:  Well, the first is to love me.  The second is to love your neighbor. 

Me:  (yawning and stretching in bed) Oh—is that all?  That’s only two!  Sure—I’ll be able to do those.  I already love ya, God and I’m pretty cool with the people who live around me.  So, yep, I’ll do those things for you.

God:  I’m so glad to hear you are willing, but let me tell you some specifics. 

Me: Umm, okay, but make it snappy, I have to take a shower and fix school lunches and check FaceBook before 7:15am.

God:  Well, loving me today will mean making those school lunches with a cheerful attitude and stopping to give $10 to a homeless woman. 

Me:  Oh alright—I can try to have a good attitude about lunches and I’ll give the money if I see a homeless woman…but does it have to be $10? 

God:  Oh, you’ll see the homeless woman.  It will be while you are running late.  And I won’t make you give $10, but that is what she needs today.

Me:  Ok, ok, got it.  Can I get in the shower now? 

God:  Hold on, I have a few more specifics.  I’d also like for you to pray all day, give thanks no matter what is going on, and forgive your husband.

Me:  (groan-eye-roll-neck-failure) Pray all day??!  I just told you I have to take a shower!  And I suppose you want me to give thanks for this sinus headache I feel coming on.  And what do you mean, forgive my husband?  He hasn’t done anything wrong.

God:  Yet.

Me:  What?

God: He hasn’t done anything wrong yet.  Your husband is going to mess something up today.  I want you to forgive him.

Me:  (another eye-roll) Ugh, okay, fine.

Fortunately, when we respond poorly, God does not snatch back his tools and say, “fine!  I’ll do it myself!”  Unlike my own immaturity in response to my daughter’s attitude, God stays calm and loving.  He doesn’t force me to do these things.  Instead, He asks.  He invites me to walk in relationship with Him. 

God: (serious eyes, slight smile) Oh, my daughter, did you forget?  You won’t have to do these things in your own strength.  I’ll be with you every moment.  Lean into me.  Let my love fill you up and overflow onto those around you.  Let my grace fill you with rejoicing even as you make school lunches and referee during breakfast.  Let my abundance fill you and you will easily hand that homeless woman $10.  You will even ask her name.  You will smile.  Listen for my voice all day and respond—that’s all prayer is.  You can talk to me even while you are driving, cleaning, or shopping.  There is still much to be thankful for even if you have a sinus headache coming on—not the least of which is my grace, which will carry you through the difficulties of this day.  Remember my grace towards you and you won’t have any trouble forgiving your husband. 

Me:  (speechless.) 

You see, God gives us the tools to do what He asks, just as I offered Abbey the proper tools to do the things I asked her to do.  But God even goes a step further—He gives us the strength.  He places His hand on ours as we Windex.  All we have to do is let Him.  We can listen to His voice, accept His small list of tasks, and lean into His strength to obey. 

Or, we can roll our eyes, groan, and walk away for the day—selfishly striving after elusive creature comforts, grumbling about tasks, averting our eyes from the needy, and refusing to forgive those who wrong us. 

But then, we miss the opportunity to serve in relationship with Him. 

Amazingly, He’s still there the next morning or later that afternoon—whenever we decide to heed His invitation to serve by His strength.  He is there, tools outstretched, buckets of love and grace ready to lavish upon you and through you to others.

I get to decide--am I going to roll my eyes or open my heart?

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1 Thessalonians 5:12-24

12 But we request of you, brethren, that you appreciate those who diligently labor among you, and have charge over you in the Lord and give you instruction, 13 and that you esteem them very highly in love because of their work. Live in peace with one another. 14 We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone. 15 See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people. 16 Rejoice always; 17 pray without ceasing; 18 in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 19 Do not quench the Spirit; 20 do not despise prophetic utterances. 21 But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good; 22 abstain from every form of evil.

23 Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you entirely; and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved complete, without blame at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

24 Faithful is He who calls you, and He also will bring it to pass.