Wednesday, April 30, 2014

A Lifetime of Instructions in Two Pages

Here’s what I hate: trying to fit a lifetime of instructions into two pages. 

Bill and I are going to Vancouver, BC on a trip soon.  We have not been far away from the girls on a trip like this for several years.  We need this getaway and are very excited…except when I think about dying.  (Yep, the thought of dying generally does put a damper on a romantic weekend.) 

We had to update our Will—you know, just in case our plane falls out of the sky or we eat bad sushi or something.  But in all seriousness, it got me thinking: what if we die and the girls are left without any parents!?  If I think about this too much I stop breathing and get very emotional about the thought of missing birthdays, weddings, and so many firsts for my sweet daughters.  I worry about them stumbling through life without our expert guidance…well, okay, not expert, but we do know slightly more than they do and we love them more than anyone!  How will they survive without our love!? 

Hmmm, well, they will survive the way countless orphans survive—by God’s grace and super-natural love that pours out in unexplainable ways.  God’s heart is for the orphan and He will surround them and help them continue through life.  They won’t just survive—they will thrive! 

However, the mother in me wants to give them last minute instructions—like don’t ride on a motor-cycle…your hair will get hopelessly tangled.  And don’t lean backwards in your chair on a date.  Things that I hope to teach to them over a lifetime together will have to be crammed into a short two-page letter.  Here are some highlights:

Jesus will never let you down. 
God is bigger than you think.  He can handle your doubts and questions and anger.
Character is key.  I pray that you will yield to God’s hand in your life and that you will regard spiritual formation as most important in your life.  (This should also be the top priority of the man you choose to marry!—His heart and walk with God matters much more than his career or his skin color.)
Take pleasure in life.  God gives us great gifts—enjoy them! (James 1:17)
Be thankful. 
Be content with what you have. 
Always do your best. 
Be wise with money.
Tell jokes, but not crude ones. 
Serve others—it’s the perfect antidote for selfishness.
Tell the truth.
Dress for yourself, not for boys.  God made you beautiful inside and out!  Have confidence in His love for you and let His light shine in you!  
Honor God with your body.  Maintaining your innocence might be difficult, but purity will always feel good in the morning.

I’ve written the letters and enclosed them with our “Last Will and Testament.”  However, I sincerely hope that I get to teach them these things over time and in person.

This entire exercise has made me realize that parenthood is an amazing, yet utterly terrifying prospect.  I mean, whether I live or die, there is no guarantee that they will take heed to all this “great” advice.  In fact, they will probably ignore much of it. 

So, the one thing that I hope they get from a letter like this is the same thing I hope they get from living under my parental care.  That one thing is love.  I hope that they know without a doubt that all of my teaching, instruction, orders, lessons, and coaching are motivated by love.  I love them deeply and want them to have a spiritually rich and meaningful life.  This leads me to try to show them how to have that kind of life.  But it’s completely up to them what steps they will take.

As much as I love my sweet daughters, (and strive to do so unconditionally), God loves us more.  MORE!  I think that He hopes that we know that all his teachings, instruction, orders, lessons, and coaching are motivated by love. He loves us deeply and wants for us to have a spiritually rich and meaningful life.  This led him to come and show us how to have that kind of life.  But it’s completely up to us what steps we will take. 

I love holding Abigail’s slender hand in mine.  I love kissing Lexi’s soft cheek.  I love laughing with them and snuggling on the couch.  I love when we are all working in the kitchen together.  I love watching them run.  I love reading to them.  I love the smell of their hair and the sound of their voices.  I love the dark fringe of lashes brushing freckled cheeks.  I love braiding hair and singing the Doxology in the car every morning. 

The thought of being separated from them is excruciating, but at least I know it would only be for a little while.  God shutters at the thought of being eternally separated from His creation.  So, He made a way back—a way to have abundant life in relationship with Him!

For God so loved the world, that He gave His one and only son, that whoever believes in Him, will not die, but have eternal life.  John 3:16  

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